Real-life-stories 2

Russell

A bit about yourself. Your history.

Faultless childhood.

Left school with midrange CSE’s and achieved one O-level in music.Joined Royal Marines at 16 and served for 7 years until injury resulted in medical discharge. Devastated because it was a career that he loved. Always wanted to be a soldier since he was a child. Couldn’t make his mind up about whether he wanted to be a soldier or a sailor so he split the difference and joined the Marines.

During that time there was a massive drink culture in the Marines. If you didn’t go out on a night and get slaughtered there was something wrong with you. When he was discharged, he was still living in a garrison so was still associating with the lads he had served with. He didn’t mind because they
were the only real family that he knew. He would go out and drink every night. Some had duty different nights but as Russell was no longer serving,
he could go any night.

Married to a local girl in Devon which quietened him down quite a bit but found that he was still drifting into nights out with the lads he had recently served with which was becoming a problem with his relationship and his wife. It got to a point where she got fed up and left. Moved back to Leeds and started living the single life again which meant going to pubs and trying to find another lady.

Eventually found a young lady who enjoyed a drink but didn’t have any problems with it because for her, it was just a social thing.

He had been to college and qualified as an electronics engineer so he had a good job. He had a nice house in a nice area of Leeds but drifted into going to the pub after work for a couple of hours which turned into full nights of drinking and in some cases, coming back the next morning.

It slowly turned into a situation where getting a drink was more important than his home, his wife and in some cases more important than going to work.His wife got fed up and called it a day. She had had enough.

Russell took solace in alcohol.

His boss was getting worried and had a word with him to say it had to stop. It got to the point where he was drinking 5 pints in a 30 minute lunch break
and a litre of cider before going to work.

He woke up one morning and thought “I’m not going to work today” and never went back.

From there everything descended into chaos. He eventually had to move out of his family home and into a small flat but booze became more important than rent and utilities so he would sit drinking in the dark rather than pay bills. Eventually, he was evicted.

He spent some time on a psychiatric ward followed by a period in alcohol rehabilitation which was effective for about 2 weeks after he had come out.

He then lived on the streets for about 2 years before eventually finding a bed space in the overnight centre at the crypt.

This is where it all gets better.

After about 2 months, he was invited to see a gentleman at the Crypt who he didn’t know but turned out to be Chris Fields. Chris offered him a place in Regent Terrace, which was like heaven. He had his own bedroom, his meals were prepared and he could drink all day. About 2 to 2½ months into his stay at Regent Terrace he became ill. He was drinking an average of 16 litres of white cider a day. He had turned yellow and was advised to go to hospital but he turned down the advice and didn’t want to go. So, the staff at Regent Terrace put him in a car and took him away!

After being in the car, he woke up and worked out that he was in hospital. There was a nurse nearby who upon being asked how long he had been there answered, “2 and a half weeks”. He’d been in a coma for that time.

Doctors informed him that at one point they had thought that he wouldn’t last overnight and on a second occasion they were extremely concerned and thought that he may not even last a few hours so they called the hospital chaplain.

During a time of utter despair when he was on the streets and had been drinking, when he started to fade away because of the drink, he would pray that he would never wake up. The hospital basically told him…drink again and you won’t make it. That made him think. He realised that actually, he didn’t want to die. The result…he would never drink again.

He was in for 2½ months which gave him a chance to reflect on things. He thought it was getting daft and it had to stop.

He was discharged to Faith Lodge. It was the perfect environment for him as it was an entirely dry house. Professional support from staff and peer support from residents really helped because the residents had all been through similar experiences.

He started volunteering at Crypt. He had suggested the idea to staff for two reasons…anti-boredom and therapy. He’s still a volunteer at the Crypt today.He feels he owes his life to the Crypt. He wants to repay the Crypt but has no money so he does it with his time. He has now spent 18months volunteering.

He’s not only thankful for the support from the Crypt but for the random acts of kindness he has received. He used to play the saxophone so one of the staff gave him a saxophone. Another member of staff gave him a car. The manager at Regent Terrace had previously had to clean up the effects of alcohol after Russell had been drinking and has now invited Russell to his wedding.

Russell feels that he couldn’t have done it alone. He knows that it is partly down to himself that he stopped drinking but he has only succeeded with the support of the Crypt.

What caused you to drink?

I don’t know. There was no catastrophic event in my life that caused it. It was once suggested that it was because of experiences I had in the Royal Marines and so, may have been post traumatic stress disorder but that has never been confirmed.

I would say that I was caught up in drinking culture. I was very good at drinking which gave a reputation that I enjoyed. It was my lifestyle. Having a laugh and being able to entertain people because of the drink. Initially I was addicted to the lifestyle but eventually I was addicted to the alcohol. I was in denial about it because I didn’t know. I thought I just enjoyed spending the time with my mates and that’s why I felt better when I was there. Actually, I was feeling better because I was drinking. The fact that I was with friends seemed to cover it up. Everyone knew but me. I never realised the link. I just drifted into it and was addicted before I realised there was a problem which is just like everyone else
I have spoken to that is an alcoholic or recovering. If I did drink again, I know that I wouldn’t be able to stop.

How did it affect your life?

What challenges did you face?

I lost everything. Not just material things but pride and self esteem.
I haven’t seen my children for 4 years.

One of the challenges I faced was people’s attitudes. Because you’re scruffy and dirty, you’re viewed like dirt. It’s only the professionals that don’t see you like that. It’s an obstacle in itself. People think you’re a complete waster. They think alcoholism is a lifestyle choice. If I was going to choose a lifestyle, that wouldn’t be it!

The main challenge was just getting through each day. The only thing you worry about is where your next drink will come from. It’s your only real concern.

When was the turning point?

In hospital. I was told that I would die and realised that I didn’t want to. It had really come down to the wire. Things couldn’t get any lower. The only way was up.

How did the Crypt help?

Support. When I went to Regent Terrace I had no intention of stopping drinking. When I was advised and decided I wouldn’t go to hospital, I was forced to. It was a move by the staff that saved my life in the first instance and was the beginning of my recovery.

I received moral and professional support at the same time. Although it had been my idea to volunteer, staff enabled me to do so and encouraged me to engage in things like the volunteering.

Reflection. How are things now?

What are you doing?

Absolutely magnificent. I can’t remember the last time I was this happy. I am completely dry. I get no cravings or temptation. I am perfectly at ease in a pub with a coke while other people are drinking around me. It doesn’t affect me. I don’t care.

I get fulfilment with volunteering.

I have returned to music. I used to play clarinet and saxophone and have started playing again.

I get satisfaction in knowing that people’s opinions about me and attitudes towards me have changed. People respect me and treat me as a human being. Now, although people know what I have been, they take me as I am.

When people find out I was a ‘tramp’ they seem to think I have never done anything else let alone serve my country, gain professional qualifications with 20 years in the electronics industry and bring up a family.

I’m now in a relationship with a young lady that I first dated in 1975. She found out I was volunteering at the Crypt and turned up at the door to find me. We’ve now been together just over 3 months.

It’s all down to one thing and one thing alone…stopping drinking. I have made no efforts in any other direction. Everything that has happened has followed from that one thing.

How do you see your life developing in the future?

I want to get back into full-time employment. Back in electronics industry because it’s what I know. It’s what I’m comfortable with.

I would like my relationship to develop and progress because she is a very special lady to me.

Depending on what the courts say, it is really important for me to get a relationship back with my children.

That’s it really. A job, my lovely lady and my children and I’ll be happy as Larry!.

Back to top